Smear Campaigns & Betrayal Trauma – Evening TV

Smear Campaigns & Betrayal Trauma – Evening TV

Smear campaigns, flying monkeys,
you know destroying your reputation, telling lots of lies about you, all
of it comes together in something called BETRAYAL TRAUMA .So we’re going to talk
about BETRAYAL TRAUMA so stay tuned. I’m Evening Ransom welcome
to Evening TV. Betrayal trauma is what you go through if a relationship is supposed
to be safe, like a marriage or like your relationship with your mother or your
father or your sibling or your best friends. These are suppose be safe places
for you, and if you discover that these people have been
lying about you, or gossiping about you or stealing from you, or
anything like that then it’s a huge betrayal . It’s a breakdown of
your whole sense of reality,. We have to assume the best of the people that we
love. and we have to be able to assume that
that we’re basically on the same page and you know that has things so and so
you know there are a lot of things that we just sort of
we end up getting blind spots man betrayal blindness because we have this
belief system that these people love me and they want the best for me and they
feel like if they feel about me the way I feel about them and this and that the
other thing well if you’re in the relationship if you’re in relationship
with narcissistic people there comes a day when you start to realize that your
relationship is not mutual at all and that all of the feelings that you have
for them and their behaviors that you took for granted we’re not we’re not
mutual we’re not being given back to you and it is a huge huge betrayal any idea
how big how big betrayal it is they were talking this betrayal trauma research
that I was doing they were saying they were talking about the primary betrayal
here talking about was a romantic achieve like someone cheating from a
cheating incident the cheating spouse neither narcissistic spouses to cheating
spouse they say that it takes between 18 months to 3 years to get over that okay
so you take that and you combine it you multiply it out for like say it’s your
spouse your siblings your parents your friends and it goes on and on and on for
years I mean how long is that gonna take you to heal from it you know and so
you know it’s just no it’s a real proactive effort
plain and simple we call it a smear campaign at least fancy words for it but
really what it is is this gossip it’s simple plain and simple gossip and and you you know you wonder why is it
working so well but you know they’ve been with Adam for a long time maybe
they’ve been chipping away at this for a long time they didn’t just do this when
you’re when you’re learning about it they’ve been at it for weeks months or
years in my case it was years my case it was a decade he’d been at setting this
whole thing up and you know it’s just an everybody level playing field you’re not
the first person they’ve done it to first of all they’ve never you’ve never
looked at each other the same way he never was you know he or she was never
trust in you and ever invested in you never never was never on the same it was
never the same thing they had you sized up as someone they were going to do this
to eventually if they needed to or when they needed to and they just pulled the
trigger on it you know how do they smear you look what is it that they do well
what they do is they between your your people there are people and the
authorities they say they first they do things like
try and make people think that your gossiping about them or make people
jealous of you or you know certainly turn you’re trying to build creates an
animosity towards you and then when they decide you’re gonna do this thing they
will go to people that they know they that they that they’re pretty sure are
going to either either have a beef with you are jealous of you or that they’ve
already set up to believe that you’ve been talking about them or you know you
don’t like them or something like that they’re people that already have that
will readily betray you those persons they go to you so that when it goes up
and you a beer a bigger arena of people it has some legs it it has some
credibility sign that you have betrayal trauma are basically they’re the typical
things they’re like you know intense emotional pain of course depression and
anxiety , recycling thoughts, going over and over and over things in your head,
shame about “How could I have let that happen?”
“:How could I not have known?” “How could I make that mistake?”

Loss of trust not just of them, but loss of trust in general.
Of people in general, of love in general, of yourself. Basically you know a
total loss of trust . Intense fear you know a lot of fear about how am I going
to survive how am I gonna make it in this world how would I even trust myself
is maybe I am crazy movie it maybe the kids aren’t better off without me you
know maybe he’s right huge insecurity and a lot of anger well
you were you were really an angry person before they let rage just comes up and
it’s important to know you know our emotions have purposes you know our
motions of reasons and anger is telling you that you’ve been violated you know
anger is telling you that you that something’s happened that you’ve been
encroached on and you need to do something and so you know these these
which is true you know which is actually true so you know these emotions do hell
have a purpose so the point is to try and keep keep them under control so that
you can use that for the purposes is intended and what they’ll do is when
you’re down and out when you’re in your very weakest moment then they will
strike and you’ll be very calculated when you get to know about it it’ll be
going on for quite a while and the damage will be done and then it will be
orchestrated how you’ll find out about it and
and that will also be it’ll it’ll be calculated in situation so that you will
be really in bad shape really really vulnerable and perhaps
have a very dramatic and emotional reaction.
They’ll say things about you that either have like a
little nugget of truth that’s completely out of context like you have migraine
headaches once a month or something and you take some kind of medicine for that
they’ll make it seem like you are drug addict and you’re on pills you know that kind of thing.
Or so you like to have a glass of wine on Friday night or something
they’ll be like making it all about you being an alcoholic, they’ll take pictures of
the recycling bin with all of their own beer bottles and stuff in the
in the can. And that’s the other thing they’ll do. They’ll project the
stuff that they’re doing actually onto you and that way they’ll also know in
detail what the abuses are. They’ll be able to describe them in detail. But there’ll
be things like you know that you’re abusive, that you are not taking
care of the house well they’re away at work or you know that
you’re spending them money like it’s going out of style that you just
you can’t keep up with you and you’re spending you know that kind of thing and
yo your God having sex with it anymore you’re an addict or you’re crazy you
have some kind of mental disorder when it’s been acting so
angry towards you indifferent towards you and remove from you and all that but
you’ve been given the clothes so learn from everybody for such a long time that
you are you know emotionally wrung out in my case when does happen to me I had
literally died I’d literally had a heart attack and that’s when it began that’s
when the whole he started that’s when he started doing this doing this talking
about me behind my back so that you know a few minutes later I was completely you
know just beside myself completely I’ve been gas lit it was like you know
everyone’s denying it was good everyone was acting so weird and acting so
abusive it’s so distant and I had just literally I was lucky to be alive
and it was like my whole entire family all the people closest to me
racking like they were angry at me for being alive and fretting you for living
and being disabled you know seemed like it was very clear that they resented me
but I have this they have that you have this emotional blindness because the truth of what was really happening
was truly so awful for one thing but for the other thing is it was so far from my
frame of reference because in my frame of reference I had always told myself in
society owes told me there was no one ever looking along and said that there
was any potential for that your that your parents are your brother or your
husband could not possibly not love you could possibly be conspiring against you
especially when this isn’t the way it supposed to go you’ve never done
anything to these people but be completely devoted but love them and try
and be a great daughter a great sister a great wife
you’ve tried to do everything really really well and this isn’t ours was to
work you know how is it possible that these people that you’ve joined your
life to pleasing are our knots are saying you know really
bad things about you and after you like you don’t matter that comes they don’t
love you and don’t care about you so it’s just so far from your favor effort
yeah when they start saying things to you
like you know you haven’t been the same since the kids were born or something
like that you’ll start thinking blaming yourself
you have yourself full of shame you don’t talk to anybody you know I you
know I didn’t tell the only person I told but my head when my parents would
be abusive towards me the person I told was my husband and when he was a musical
term and didn’t tell anybody because he in chorus him marrying me where’s my
evidence that I have that I was lovable after all you know it’s my parents were
they never saw that in there so I love you they were you never protective of me
and so when he was crazy about me learn to marry me I was like to see I’m a
little after all so I wasn’t about to tell them he’s now abusing me because I
would I was sure their answer would be we’ll see you’re just so hard to love
you know see it even he can love you got these dudes possible look which was what
she was saying you know which is what he was it now I get why your parents were
always like that you know or you know he had set me up
have all these public different people I know he was saying don’t you think the
common denominator is you know you you know of course how I worked with that
cuz I absolutely did so last thing I thought was that she was going around
poisoning my relationships you know just you know didn’t didn’t compute to me
more or less plan that there’s going to be a discard eventually they may not
know exactly when it’s gonna be but but you know they well they make sure they
have a way out when they want to go and my husband decided it was time to go
because I was now sick and I need help plus he now have basically he theory he
got all the goodies out of being married to me that he was gonna get and you know
and also I had I knew him you know I knew him to healthy people
that’s intimacy that’s what our goal is is to you know over time to to really
know somebody and love somebody and all that but this is an intimate intimacy
disorder and so you know that was something he just could not stand and
same with my parents you know their biggest although I love that narcissists
their biggest fears to be discovered to be found out so to be known by someone
especially someone who is different who isn’t who isn’t buying into the
narrative because they don’t need the neurochip see and I was inviting you to
the narrative when I was kids up because I believed it but as I got older I was
trying to fall out fall apart and actually this heart attack came after
years of depression because I just you know I just felt disconnected
I didn’t feel like I probably something was missing in my relationships and all
this stuff well this is what the problem was it was it wasn’t that I wanted to I
just wasn’t like them and I couldn’t I wasn’t able to fake it I was made he was
making me sick he was literally killing me and this this was intolerable to all
of them and they couldn’t just you know he couldn’t just break up if you can
just have a regular divorce because you know a he didn’t have any were used to
me so that mean he it meant he had to destroy me let’s do anything what he
didn’t want to give up any of his assets or any of his friends or any of his
socials any of his social status that he gained by being married to me he wanted
to still look like a perfectly good guy he actually wanted to be kind of you
want to be come out like a victim you know actually what he was is he I
had in his head where I almost died that he wanted that whatever was gonna be his
reality if I died was perfect because then he would be he would get to keep
all the friends all the assets and all of control and plus you get some
sympathy that was perfect so he was still going for that Bowl and you know
and so he had to make me look really bad to do that
and you know hopefully you know maybe try me to keep it suicide or you know
something and so you know he was just pretty terrible rumors about me and you
know it paid me out to be doing these things that no one had ever seen me do
no it had ever seen any of this of me doing these things but but he was able
to you know say that I was and I had been kind of you know distant and
removed from people and this is this elbow I’m sure this is the case this is
very typical is that I had over time because of the abuse everything I had
been more isolated and more removed and that’s adult do first first still first
isolate you from other people and they get you down to just you know them and
their friends as much as possible who would you
can do is very little I mean you really can’t do a whole lot about it you don’t
want to try and you want first of all to avoid reacting you want to avoid
reacting you want to be careful you want to be careful who you can try to tell
the truth to you know really turbo who you want to tell the truth to and the
best thing you do is if you have any any hard evidence provide that evidence to
the P to whoever it is and then just leave it with them and don’t tell them
what you want them to do or you know because people don’t like to be told
what to do some any evidence have any hard evidence of you know can prove that
you are not that the stuff you saying is lies definitely use that definitely use
that but aside from that aside from anything that you can actually prove
with her evidence you’re really best thing you can do is just live your life
and prove it by the way that you’re living and you know and hopefully
you know effect you’re here and hearing about it if you’re in the middle of if
you’re in the middle of this and you’re hearing this now that’s good news you
know because I didn’t know about any of this until years after it was over so
years after it was over and so I had already made every mistake in the book
and it was really devastating and it was really the impact it had was just really
incredibly incredibly bad on me and my kids I mean he really did pretty good
job of destroying my life you know really it was really really devastating
and it partly was B was devastating because I was so vulnerable I was so I
was just it was just a textbook case of like you know I just I had every
everything that made me you know maybe a really prime target especially I have
this really abusive family and I had a lot of narcissistic friends I had a lot
of people that were easily easy for him to manipulate and I didn’t know that you
know I there’s no way I could have known that so that made it you know especially
especially devastating you know so that’s basically what to do about is in
this case you really need to really look help if you can seek professional help
but here’s the key seeking professional help really really is helpful because
this kind of trauma is so overwhelming but you’re gonna run into problems
because traditional therapy will give you just the wrong advice because
because well first of all I also depends on how well you understand what’s going
on if you have a full grip on this you know he’s a narcissist
you know you’ve been smear campaign you know you know what you know you you’ve
got this landscape figured out that will help but even with that even with that
mainstream therapy doesn’t doesn’t really know about narcissistic abuse and
I did a lot of research about betrayal trauma and all the advice that they were
giving was exactly wrong for a person who’s been betrayed by a narcissist or
many exorcists because you know they were talking primarily about cheating
and they were saying you know to involve them in your healing process and you
know try and work things out with them and it’s like know what happens to
completely the wrong thing to do so you know but you do definitely need to ask
for help ask for help and you know find a therapist that knows about betrayal
trauma knows about sea PTSD knows about personality disorders I would say
personality disorders first and trauma next just because the way that they
would approach trauma is not going to be they’re not going to be as protective of
you as they need to be if they don’t understand that you were up against
narcissistic abused certain methods like EMDR that really does help that kind of
unhook some things from from your from the sea PTSD from the emotional
reactions you’re having it gets things out of your your lizard brain up into so
you can start using your executive functions better because in trauma
that’s really what happens is you get so overwhelmed I mean you can think about
you know I mean how helps saying that’s going to be in your brain when you have
everything currently to the ground about what your family stood for your marriage
stood for your friendships and all these people that you trusted all your life
now your you know they’ve all betrayed you you
know we’re doing the math you start feeling up okay my mom’s a nurse assist
well that means they don’t have any empathy they’re really how you kept
conscience they don’t have a look prerequisites for love so that means my
mother never loved me you know you’re going through all this like you know
just it’s mind-blowing it can take a long long time to get through all of
that what makes us so different from you know like the the infidelity betrayal
and all that kind of stuff is that is exactly that it’s this is not something
that just happened you know spur of the moment without you know without thinking
and planning and without a lot of like layer upon layer upon layer of Lies and
gaslighting and betrayal and you know I mean the amount of things that they had
to go our way to say – you know – you know the way that they were had to be
thinking saying their time thinking about how to hurt you you know it’s just
devastating whereas you know if someone has an affair it’s Pritz not like that
usually a regular person now not a narcissistic or just a regular person
has an affair obvious but it’s not gonna be focused on just wanted you mean
things to you that’s not gonna be the purpose of it purpose of having an
affair is not to do mean things to you it’s just
it’s something that they did with when they didn’t want to have to think about
you at all well that’s that’s not what’s happening here
here this is a plot at tire plant that the person you devoted your life to you
the person that you were busy protecting and taken care of is all a while back
stabbing you to the people you care about the most and the things that they
will go after are the things that matter to you the very most and the you know
the people that matter to the very most and the things matter and for me it was
relationships my whole life was based on relationships and wanting to be wanting
to love and be loved in a community of people and so and they have a family and
so of course that was what he went for first but it wouldn’t come off as gossip
either it’ll come off they would come out acting concerned that would be the
big thing they would use it I’ve concerned but they would also make sure
to pepper things like blonde oh she said this about you too or you know she needs
to she’s just not herself lately she says she’s making comments about how
you’re a bad mom or whatever it is that you know like making sure to drop these
little things to make people get really pissed off at you and you know to this
day I have no idea what he could have said to some of these people because
there were people that you know I’ve known all my life that I just completely
turned on me and I have no idea what he told them but some of them I do know
what he told them because he told me or you know some
fucking around where I figured it out what do you believe he’s telling people
but there are some there’s still a mystery but it was he did again he did a
good job and the main thing it was that was so so devastated for me was that he
had he went to my family first because they were an abusive family and he knew
he could I was already I was already the black sheep to begin
with so he knew you get them to get on his side and so he everybody no one else
would know that because I was loyal to them so I never told anybody about that
you know I always wanted to make L was wanting to make make it seem like that
is loving family and I hoped it would be you know he got them first and then that
was very convincing everybody else there’s just really not anything you can
do besides live a good life and you know it you know
cut your losses you know basically don’t react to me and don’t give them a lot of
supply for doing it don’t defend yourself show me evidence you have if
you have it and then you know to relocate make new friends whatever it is
anyhow but getting help of material betrayal trauma it’s really something
you need to ask for help you need to go out find some help and professional help
because it’s not it’s not just that easy to just you know get over by yourself
and you’ll kind of just keep going over it not sleeping well and it can go on
for a long time it’s really SAP your reserves and affect your your physical
health have you experienced this smear campaign what happened with you please
answer in the comments much for being here and please subscribe if you haven’t
already like the video and if you want to talk to me in private please get a
hold of me on the instance though

16 thoughts on “Smear Campaigns & Betrayal Trauma – Evening TV

  • Have you experienced a .smear campaign? Please comment, like & SUBSCRIBE🔔- and don't forget to hit the notification bell!! Thanks for being here.

  • My brother is doing this to me & it surprises me that my mother swallows everything he say's with absolutely no evidence .[ there is no evidence !]

  • My brother is doing this to me & I can't believe she believes him as if it is gospel . stay strong evening have a wonderful life baby.

  • Yes. 

    Long story short, I had an unhealthy relationship with my father, and people were jealous of me because he gave me money and presents. I found out that people I thought were my friends only wanted to be friends of me for this reason. I never told them – or anyone else – he also molested me. 

    These frenemies would pressure me to do things like foot the bill at restaurants because my father was so generous with me. At first I gave into them, because I wanted to be a good friend to them. Then they escalated these demands on me, trying to get me to buy them things. I stopped doing it and withdrew from them, simply because I felt I couldn't deal with them any more. 

    Then, one day, I overheard them bad-mouthing me, saying how pathetic I was because I was such a daddy's little girl. I confronted them, telling them I overheard them say this, and if they really didn't like me or want to be friends with me any more, that was fine. 

    They denied that they said any of those things, telling me that I was oversensitive and was being too paranoid. They acted like I needed to grow up and be "mature" about this situation. They seemed to be in such total denial about their dissing me behind my back, and I couldn't get them to apologize or admit they used me. 

    Not knowing what else to do, I ghosted them.

    They were really pissed at me. They would often call me and leave irate messages on my answering machine, demanding that I call them back. I never did. One of them called me for two or three years. I completely ignored him.

    They never threatened me, but I had this feeling that they wanted to, since I thought I could hear this we're-gonna-get-you-for-this tone in their voices. More than once, I wondered if they were planning to physically harm me in some way.

    I hid from them. Eventually, I moved across the country, partly to get away from them.

    Sorry if this is too long. Thank you for your fabulous videos, and I'm so glad your life is good now.

  • thank you.

    i'm really suffering from the loss of my x girlfriend of 15 yrs who i knew was a narc for the last few years, and treated her like shit because she didn't allow me to treat or react to her ways any other way, without being completely disrespectful to myself.

    we were saving to have a mature departure from us, and our expensive home, etc, and after we got her new house setup, it was my turn, and during that entire time she tortured me with endless endless non stop drama, to the point that i literally have almost gone crazy, attempted to set me up with the police, and her family rescuing her, etc and now i'm left here in this very dark cold empty house like i'm living with the dead body of our leftover hell of a relationship, only to not have a job, not enough money to move properly, no friends or family because i discovered they were all narcs over the last few years as well…

    and i can't believe i'm in tears missing her and pathetically wanting to contact her to please come back to me, even though it was her that did all of this…

    and i know she's already with another guy as of no more than two weeks after leaving me here. (she left 6 weeks ago)

    i cannot believe i'm in the state of yearning for her this bad, all while i had known she's a narc for years, and thought i would be able to laugh my way through the loss of her.


    thanks for your vids

  • My childhood abuse made me a set up for other abusers in my life. I left my home and childhood having no boundaries, defenseless and having no knowledge or support in finding healthy relationships remained mostly bullied and exploited by family and peers. I learned to be happy by myself but this seem to only anger those who despised and bullied me, that I didn't need them to feel better in my life. I suffered a smear campaigns at work by bullies the employers didn't want to deal with appropriately. It seems I made a better target for the bully than the one she'd had to bully prior to my arrival there and her bullying began on the first week of my job with her shout me down me in front of the other employees. Who is prepared for something like this? I didn't realize that people asking me weird and strange questions at work was due to the work bully saying things and inferring things behind my back and making things up things to lie about me. Of course, I looked pretty stupid doing nothing because I was never allowed any boundaries or allowed to defend myself except to wait until the abuse passed hoping for the best or hope or think that something good will come after it. When I did begin defending myself, I was made to look like it was me who was the instigator and by the time I realized what was going on it was too late for any kind of legal recourse. Later, I realized that there were already two other lawsuits in the works ahead me of people filing complaints about issues connected to the department I'd worked in that I didn't know about before being hired.

    Only do EMDR if you have a good therapist capable of compassion and empathy that also understands the victims of Narcissistic Abuse. Otherwise, they will essentially call you retarded for taking the abuse, become another flying monkey, or diagnose and treat your C/PTSD symptoms as some other or a more stigmatizing diagnosis, and or put you on debilitating medications designed for the treatment of other mental illnesses. There are very few professionals in the area I live, much less any competent ones and as for caring ones, even less so, if any that recognize narcissistic abuse.

    Lastly, consider that many therapists in the field are ill and narcissistic themselves and in one case I wound up being re-abused by a couple of them who lied to me, lied about me with one who began violating all of my boundaries what few boundaries I'd had left after opening up all my memories with their so-called "EMDR therapy". The latter began setting up appointments to come to my home where upon I was exposed many more of their inappropriate and odd behaviors. For this reason, EMDR was the worse thing that ever happened to me. Hence, my main stay of therapy dwindled down to Prayer and Blessings from God, knowing that Christ was my Savior and you tube videos put out by those in the community helping victims of Narcissistic abuse.

  • Thanks for your video
    I've also lived through what you describe.
    I feel the understanding of our trauma leads to self forgiveness.
    The way you describe the total annihilation of our support system is so true.
    We lived with really weird people.
    Looking back at my childhood we were really poor. We had an uncle who would help to deliver food to needy families at Christmas. He would bring us some boxes. One year he stopped and we had come to expect it.
    I now believe that , with 100% certainty, that my father told him to stop.
    Some people thought my father was a great guy.
    Thanks again

  • l've never heard any woman talk whose story is so similar to mine!!!! stay strong…and thank you for being so brave!

  • This is so textbook. I went through rhe exact same scenario. I was in a relationship with a narc for 9 years (i was 12 when I started seeing him). I was the perfect prey. I was innocent, naive, I came from childhood abuse and neglect. I was codependent and deeply insecure. I moved around a lot and had very few good friends. I eventually left my abusive home and started living with him and his family at 16 (he was 19). Little to my knowledge, he was grooming me into further abuse while portraying himself as my best friend and protector. He made me jealous of other girls. He hung out with these girls behind my back. He would brag about who he slept with with all his friends, and made me believe I was the only one he had ever slept with. Made me look like an oblivious fool. Basically played mind games for years until I eventually cracked, then proceded to crazymake me. After I had his baby, he upped the ante and started to gaslight me and physically abuse me. I would open up to mutual friends about it, and they'd always minimize my problems, then go behind my back and tell him everything I told them in confidence. This strengthened the smear campaign and gave him more time and incentive to plan the final discard. I tried so hard to leave, but everytime I came close, he would show up with flowers, letters, tears and promises he never intended to keep. Throughout the entirety of our relationship, he had already planted the seeds in everyone's minds. He discarded me violently two days before our nine year anniversary. I had no one to turn to for comfort in that time. More than a dozen of my friends burned me and defamed my character. Even people I didn't know were spreading rumors about me. I suffered in silence. I still suffer every day. Because of the trauma, I am unable to build strong relationships and trust with others. It impacts my ability to find employment because I am constantly vigilant and on edge. it causes me to dissociate. sometimes I don't even feel real. It's been four years since the discard. I still hurt like it was yesterday.

  • one of the things that kept me from killing myself when I was in my twenties was that I knew my suicide would fit so well into my narc mom and golden child sisters story about me and that they would reap emotional rewards.

  • Traditional therapy will give you the wrong advice. I got this for years. If your on medicaid you can't find therapists who know about these things. They make you worse. Im afraid to even try again.

  • OMG !!!!!! that is exectly what happens to me right now, it started with my mom attaking me till my head was open and i needed 7 steaches in frot of my kids eys ! then her sisters that u didnt think are even capable of that, went to the CPS, telling them that im so creazy and sick, that they TEMPORARELLY put MY KIDS with their narc father whom i have costedy battle whith !!!
    ALLLLLLL of that ,,,, FOR MONEY ! MY EX NARC did the same becouse he owes money to people becous of me '' '' ''thats what he thinks !!!! and my unts are trying TO GET ME OUT OF MY GRANDFATHER'S whill !!!! they got a problem with how he is deviding HIS PROPERTY !
    Problem is he likes to BLAME ME FOR EVERYTHING !
    EVENING TV , THANK U for shering that story the way u did, its like
    I miss my kids …. they need me… AND WHITH THE HELP OF GOD'S GRACE AND A FAITH MADE OF STEEL !!! the god guys will win ,
    Sending EVERYBODY UNCONDTIONAL LOOOVE and and great powers of HEALING straight FROM THE HOLLEY LAND a big hug all the way from ISRAEL


  • I have a you tube channel too. I'm a smear campaign veteran I've been involved in 4. I've lost everyone and everything. Betrayal Trauma hurts and this summer realized it had happened again. It put me in No Contact with 8 people again basically another situation which isolated me more and I'm getting very tired of making friends and losing friends. Add a severe illness and disability. There is no recourse. Fighting defending myself does nothing. Attempting to pull up Again is daunting the stress makes me more sick and single at 59 is a very scary thing when ultimately there are less and less abilities to get out of bed. Hopelessness surrounds me. Then I think I want to call someone and realize there is no one to call. This is also called Neglect. Sadly neglect will get me put in a nursing home not really the Solution I'm looking for. However I'm running out of ideas and my physical mobility has really taken a hit as as a result of the stress. Add physical disability and aging female the formula is to protect myself at all cost from exploitation which is the real deal. I suppose I realize this all is a result of Envy. Your point about how we were going along feeling safe with family and friends and the change when we realize at least I have that these people really hated me some wanted me dead. Then that puts total doubt into my ability to trust myself. I don't use Facebook because it causes triggers for me. I am interested in a safe support group tho if that even exists.

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