Chad: Hey, everybody want to let you know we have an all-new DEATH BATTLE tee if you guys like the way I look and you want to pick one up. Just click the link in the description below. Ben: It’s beautiful. (Cues: Wiz & Boomstick – Brandon Yates) Wiz: In a world where superhumans can fly through the sky or lift buildings over their head. It takes a lot more than a pair of tights for a mere mortal to stand out from the crowd. Boomstick: But these guys have it covered. Wiz: Nightwing, the original protege of Batman. Boomstick: And Daredevil, Marvel’s Man Without Fear. He’s Wiz and I’m Boomstick. Wiz: And it’s our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win… a DEATH BATTLE! In modern times, the…questionable whimsies of the circus are all but dead. Boomstick: And good riddance, because the world doesn’t need any more clowns. Wiz: Yet, in it’s heyday, few performances could top the trapeze mastery of the Flying Graysons. Boomstick: Well, until a mobster cut their cord on life short… literally. Wiz: But they had a son, young, but just as talented as them. Orphaned and alone, all seemed hopeless for Dick Grayson. Boomstick: Until he scored the coolest foster dad in the friggin universe: The goddamn Batman. Wiz: And under the Caped Crusader, Dick wasn’t just a son, he was a sidekick, a superhero, he was… Robin. Until he wasn’t. Smokey: You got knocked the (bleep) out, man! Boomstick: Robin spent many many years kicking bad guys around the back alleys of Gotham City with his new dad. Who can forget the time he crushed Blockbuster under a truck, or when he whipped out that shark repellant? Never leave home without it, kids. Wiz: But then Batman suddenly realized. “You know what, bringing kids into battle is actually a bad idea!” So he fired him. And then promptly forgot this little revelation. Boomstick: Holy time to update the resume, Batman! Probably for the best, though, I mean, come on, the kid didn’t even have a proper pair of pants! What’s your problem, Bruce? Robin: (bleep) Batman! Boomstick: Whoa, the mouth on this one. Wiz: Actually, it WAS for the best, though, not in the way Batman hoped. Inspired by a story of an ancient Kryptonian superhero. Dick took to the streets by himself with a brand new uniform and a brand new name. From then on, he would be known as… Nightwing. Boomstick: Gotta hand it to Bats, he sure knows how to mold a kid into a criminal crushin’ machine. With expertise in tae kwon do, ninjutsu, akido, and a bunch of other styles. Nightwing is one of the finest martial artist in comic book history. Wiz: No doubt helped by his world class acrobatic skills. He is one of only three people on Earth who are capable of performing a quadruple flip. Boomstick: And between the fancy schoolin’ he got at Hudson U and being a foundin’ member of the Teen Titans, he’s got brains and brawn. Plus a whole lot of weapons. Wiz: Nightwing’s suit is lightweight, bulletproof, and makes virtually no sound when moving. The blue colors even turn black while in the dark. His mask features a holographic UI, complete with night vision and a spectral analyzer. Boomstick: He’s rocking utility belts on his wrists and ankles full of lock picks, smoke pellets, and staples that are so strong, they can support the weight of a freakin’ helicopter! Wiz: He also carries a rebreather, grapple gun, and wing dings. Boomstick: That weird alien font with all the shapes? Oh, I’ll figure out your secret one day, Wing Dings. Wiz: No, no more like the Batarangs or thrown shurikens. The standard Wing Ding are extremely sharp. But he also carries doled ultrasonic and explosive variants. Boomstick: But let’s get to the good stuff like his two screaming sticks. Wiz: Escrima sticks. Boomstick: That are great for beatin’ the shit out of people. And help me pretty shocked when they find out Nightwing has wired them with 50,000 volt tasers. Wiz: Despite their falling out Nightwing clearly remains inspired by the gadgets and skills of his batty mentor. And he’s put them to good use. Boomstick: He’s strong enough to punch people through solid walls and smash through a sheet of ice from underwater. And hold back the 19,000 pounds per square inch bite force of an orca. Wiz: And while breaking a car window doesn’t sound impressive Nightwing’s done so while the car was underwater. And therefore pressurized. To pull this off he needed to impact the glass with over 24,000 pounds per square inch. Boomstick: He’s quick enough to dodge point-blank gunfire, skilled enough to leap through the city while blindfolded. And tough enough to survive fallin’ off a building. Wiz: Generally any unsafe landing over 21 feet is guaranteed to break bone. Boomstick: And Nightwing dropped 140 feet onto his butt. And he was fine. And we’ve all fallen on our tailbone. That shit sucks. Wiz: At one point Nightwing spent ninety six hours patrolling city streets looking for the criminal mastermind Two-Face. And an additional five or more hours collecting evidence. A 2010 study on sleep deprivation noted that 72 hours without sleep leads to a number of horrendous side effects including hallucinations. Boomstick: But when it was time to leap between blimps hundreds of feet in the air and give Two-Face the beatdown he deserve you couldn’t even tell Nightwing was in desperate need of a nap. And don’t forget he was trained by the number-one detective in the world. He’s good enough to solve a kidnapping with a single look at the scene of a crime. Even more impressive he once performed a skydive at 930 miles per hour which took all of 15 minutes. That puts his starting position around 25 miles high and free-falling faster than the speed of sound. For reference real-life Austrian athlete Felix Baumgartner performed a similar great leap from 24 miles up hitting a maximum speed over 800 miles per hour. To pull this off he needed a specialized suit to protect him from the extreme cold, unfiltered sunlight and lack of oxygen. One mistaken movement could have put him into a rapid spin. Rendering him unconscious and causing his blood to boil. Boomstick: And Nightwing just did it without any of that. Damn! Wiz: He’s certainly tough, but he’s had his fair share of losses. His scarred body is proof of that. And eventually him and Bats finally made up. He even took up the cowl himself when Batman was out for a while. Nightwing is one superhero who will always come out on top. Along with his partners Jim and Juan. Wiz: What? I mean it’s right there in the intern’s notes. Who’s Jim and Juan? Wiz: Oh that’s uh… that’s the names of these ladies gave him buttcheeks. Boomstick: Oh. Well… Guess you can’t argue with the ass on that Dick. Starfire: Robin? Nightwing: I haven’t used that name in a long time. Call me: Nightwing. Wiz: Before he became the Man Without Fear, Matthew Murdock was the son of a professional boxer named Battlin’ Jack. Boomstick: Sounds like a badass. But Jack actually boxed because it was the only thing he was good at. And he needed money to get his kid through school so that little Matt would have a better life than he did. Aww. What a good dad. He’s punchin’ people for his kid. Wiz: Matt still trained in secret with his father’s exercise equipment, molding himself into a powerful fighter and an expert acrobat. This new athletic ability would come in handy when he witnessed a blind man walking right in front of a speeding truck. Boomstick: Feeling especially heroic that day, Matt dove in to push the guy to safety. But the truck crashed, sendin’ some weird acid stuff flyin’ all over Matt’s face. Wiz: From that day forward, Matt was permanently blind. Matt: I-I can’t see! I CAN’T SEE!!! Wiz: Still, Matt did not give up on the dream his father wanted, he earned his degree with flying colors, and founded a law firm with his friend, Foggy Nelson. Things were actually looking up for him. Boomstick: Well, except for when his dad was killed by a mobster for ruining a rigged boxin’ match. Because you can’t be a superhero unless you’ve lost your parents. Wiz: Matt was distraught. His world had come crashing down around him, and he couldn’t even see it happen. But he could hear it, smell it, feel it. Boomstick: Yeah, cause turns out that radioactive goop didn’t just blind Matt, it gave him superpowers! So, he dressed up like the devil himself, and literally scared the mobster to death. Wiz: And so, Daredevil was born. Many blind people, particularly those born with it, experience a rewriting of the brain to heighten their other senses. Somewhat making up for their lack of sight. Boomstick: Somethin’ similar happened to Daredevil. Except, like, a hundred times greater. Wiz: His touch became so sensitive, he can tell when a person’s close to him, simply from the disturbance in the air. His ears can pick up the faintest of sounds, from the slightest movement of an enemy, to the rising heartbeat of someone who’s lying. His taste can detect each separate ingredient in any recipe, including poisons, and his nose can track you down like a bloodhound. Boomstick: Who needs eyes when you can sense everythin’ around you down to the smallest detail? But he couldn’t use his blind powers as well as he does without the trainin’ under a super secret warrior named Stick. No relation. Wiz: With Stick’s help, Matt mastered several fighting styles, including ninjutsu, Krav Maga, and Kung Fu. Boomstick: And get this. Stick had basically the same blind powers as Daredevil. Stick: Whoa! Silk sheets. Wiz: Thanks to him, Matt learned how to hone his senses to know and maneuver through his surroundings even better than those with working eyes. He also learned how to tap into something called an Atom Enduced Radar Sense. Boomstick: Like that thing that bats do when they bounce sound around to see in the dark or whatever? Wiz: Sort of. That’s sonar, or echolocation and he can use it too. But thanks to his radioactive origins Daredevil can actually emit electromagnetic energy waves from his body. Which bounce off objects in his vicinity, painting a picture of his surroundings in his head. This means he doesn’t even need sound to find and take down an opponent. Boomstick: So, he’s got a ton of ways to make up for his eye problem. But he’s also got some awesome gear to help him take out the bad guys. Like his devil suit, that’s bulletproof, shock proof, flame proof, and a perfect backup plan whenever he forgets to prep for a Halloween party. Wiz: For combat he built a versatile weapon out of his most innocuous possession: A walking cane. Boomstick: By day he’s a feeble blind man slowly tampin’ across the road. But by night he whips out the horns and snaps his cane into a high-tech billy club. Wiz: The club houses a cable, hidden blades, a recording device, and exploding pellets. Boomstick: It can even turn into a boomerang! Man, where do I get one of these? You don’t have to be blind, right? Wiz: No, but you shouldn’t. You already destroy everything without a super club. Boomstick: Well, I’d need to practice to throw it as well as he does! You know how Captain America tosses his shield all over the place and it always seems to come back to him? Well, Daredevil does the exact same thing, and he can throw it hard enough to bust concrete! He’s super strong, he can lift a four hundred pound barbell and chuck it as casually as when I toss a beer away if it’s time for a new one. Wiz: He’s quick enough to deflect bullets with his billy club, and skilled enough to bounce one back so it killed the man who fired it in the first place. Boomstick: Bet that guy wasn’t expecting that. It looks like he’s firing a Glock, which has a muzzle speed of about 1,200 feet per second. Wiz: At just twenty feet away, Daredevil had to react within seventeen milliseconds to avoid getting hit. And while he couldn’t survive a shot to the head, he’s powered through a heck of a lot when compared to the average human. Boomstick: He’s survived zaps from Electro, who’s power can burn through metal, he’s fallen multiple stories and walked away, powered through a napalm explosion and been hit by a five foot bar swung by the Ox. Who can tear through metal cages and lift more than eight hundred pounds. Wiz: His keen control over his nervous system has also helped him resist tranquilizers and toxins, but his super senses are also his biggest weakness. Boomstick: They may give him way more field awareness than most anybody else. But if his opponent knows how his powers work. They can overload his senses with an extremely loud noise or a really bad smell. Like, if you had a truckload of screaming skunks you could throw at him, that’d probably work, right? Wiz: But even with those weaknesses, Daredevil is a fearsome foe for anyone who would face him, even if he can’t see them. Boomstick: He even managed to balance his life of law and the crime fighting. And became a huge success on his own. Papa boxer would be proud. Kingpin: I’M GONNA KILL YOU! Daredevil: Take your shot. Wiz: Alright the combatants are set. Let’s end this debate once and for all. Boomstick: But first you need to treat your senses to Blue Apron. Wiz: By now, you’ve probably heard of Blue Apron the leading meal kit delivery service in the US. Boomstick: But did you know about all the different kinds of delicious foods you could make? Like the Honey chipotle glazed chicken with poblano and lime rice. Wiz: There’s plenty to choose from since they offer 12 new recipes each week. All you have to do is choose the two three or four that sound best to you and they deliver it right to your door. Boomstick: Plus, it’s super simple to cook. It’s got easy to follow instructions and perfectly proportioned ingredients. They’re non-gmo and the meat has no added hormones. My favorite part is feeling like a master chef makin’ creative and delicious meals with my own hands. You guys really need to try it out. Wiz: It’s pretty nice coming home knowing I’ll have a delicious meal I can whip up with these. Boomstick: So check out this week’s menu and get your first three meals free at Blueapron.com/Battle. That’s Blueapron.com/Battle to get your first three meals free. But right now, IT’S TIME FOR A DEATH BATTLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Daredevil: I know you’re there. You can leave now. Or I can drag you out. It’s your choice. Nightwing: Oooh, I’m shaking in my boots. Especially looking at the Prince of Darkness. But that case over there is part of an investigation I’ve been working. So why don’t you hand it over, and I’ll get out of your horns? Is that a no then? Announcer: FIGHT Nightwing: What the!? Daredevil: (screams) Nightwing: What are you? Daredevil: Better. I wish I could see… The look on your face. Nightwing: Me too. Daredevil: (screams) (Continues screaming) Nightwing: Huh. See you in hell. Announcer: KO Boomstick: What the… Was that live-action? We can do that now? Wiz: This was possibly one of our closest match-up’s to date. Despite lacking a true superhuman physique, both Nightwing and Daredevil were extremely skilled and deadly fighters. Boomstick: When it came to overpowerin’ each other, they were pretty dead even. Sure, based on their previous feats, we can tell that Nightwing seemed a little stronger and more acrobatic, and Daredevil seemed a little quicker to react. Wiz: But these differences were extremely minimal, it’s actually feasible that these two could pull off almost all the exact same feats. Boomstick: Key word being “almost”. Wiz: Right, with such similar physical abilities, this really came down to their arsenal. Nightwing’s gadgets and Daredevil’s superpowers. At first glance, these could simply counter each other, making this match completely even again. For example, both could take advantage of the dark with night vision or super senses. But only one set was perfectly suited to actively disrupt the other. Boomstick: Remember Nightwing’s scannin’ mask? There’s no way he couldn’t notice those electro waves Daredevil’s radar sense was sendin’ everywhere. Even Mr. Magoo could’ve figured out somethin’ was weird here. Let alone the guy trained by friggin Batman, you know, the greatest detective in the world? Wiz: Through a little hand to hand action. Nightwing was certainly clever enough to recognize Daredevil’s reliance to sound over sight, and had the perfect counter weapon. The ultrasonic Wing Ding. Boomstick: Look, I’m sure there were several possible scenarios where Daredevil could’ve pulled off the win. But more times than not. Nightwing takes this thanks to his athletic skill, detective training and high tech gadgets. All he had to do… Was dare to wing it. Wiz: The winner is Nightwing. Mario: Let’s a Go! Boomstick: Oh. This thing came off the camera when I was settin’ it up. Wiz: Are you telling me every single time you set up the camera you never taken the cap off!? Ben: Hey thanks for watching our 99th episode and thanks to Ismahawk for that live action fight. Chad: Plus we got a new t-shirt. Hey if you guys want to pick one up just click that shop now button right over there.