Michael Spicer: Top 10 Job Interview Tips

Michael Spicer: Top 10 Job Interview Tips


Hello. Today, I’m going to show you how
to get the job you want with ten sure-fire job
interview tips. Tip number one. Remember, every question is a test. So when they say, “How are you?”
reply, “Goal orientated, thank you.” Tip number two. Be confident but subtle. Tap flattering comments about
yourself in Morse code on the desk with a pen. Tip number three. Tell them you’re not an applicant,
you’re an appli-CAN. For added effect, lick your finger, hold it against your buttock
and make a sizzling noise. Tip number four. When asked why you’d be
suited to the job, pass an ancient scroll along
the desk and say… ..”It was foretold.” Then stare at them solemnly
for five minutes. Tip number five. Provide reliable references from
close associates to promote your skill set. Tip number six. Come to the interview with
visual aids that will highlight your
specific talents. Tip number seven. Make yourself seem important by
placing a bank of microphones on the desk and leaning into them
when answering questions. Tip number eight. Show that you’re good at
delegating responsibility by sending someone else
to the interview. Tip number nine. Show you’ll give 110% by pouring 10%
too much water into your glass. Smile knowingly. Tip number ten. Guarantee a second interview by
turning up to your first interview with an owl on your arm and not mentioning it until
the second interview. And those are your ten sure-fire
job interview tips. You’re very welcome.

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